Nonverbal Communication
Body Language and Gestures

Nonverbal communication: body language, you know... hand gestures, facial expressions, and posture.... these can tell more about a person than what we would like told. If you are working on improving self esteem, and you want to show more self confidence, then you may need to check your nonverbal communication ques.

We have all heard these pearls of wisdom:

“Actions speak louder than words”.

“Watch what they do, not what they say.”

And, “It’s now what you say, but how you say it!”

These three statements hold a world of truth. Let’s look at them from a view of our personal self esteem.

Low self esteem can effect the way you communicate, saying negative things about yourself, without you having to say a single a word. A healthy balance of self esteem can also say that you are a valuable person and have something unique to contribute.

Statistics from body language experts say that 55% of a person’s communication is non verbal. That is worth reading again. 55% of your communication is non verbal! You are saying more with your body language that you are actually speaking!


If you are confident in yourself and your abilities, it shows. You stand tall, you look people in the eye during conversation, and appear to have more energy.

When you are lacking in self esteem and your self confidence is low, then you may tend to slouch, keep your arms crossed, and mumble as you keep your eyes downcast.

Now, after reading the above two paragraphs, you can see that just by the nonverbal communication, body language that is being spoken here, what each person thinks of themselves. Not in an egotistical self-centered way, but you can see which person feels that they have something of value to offer, regardless of what other people’s opinion may be.

Having and using good body language is a vital ingredient of success. It can improve your communication skills by making your words more effective, and help give a good first impression, also helps avoid mixed messages.

Would you like to increase your attractiveness? Well, having your body language be more open can sure help! Good posture and a honest smile does wonders too.

How about an emotional booster? You realize that your mood can effect your body language, well, how about your nonverbal communication, body language, and posture, effecting your mood. It can! Hold your head high, and stand up straight. You can feel the difference in a could of minutes!

Needless to say, this can also greatly help if you have a bad body image.

So the next question to answer would be “How can you have great body language?”

You could take years on the study of body language, but that’s not where you need to begin. Yes, body language tells quite a lot about a person, but if you work on developing self esteem, you may reap the benefits of improving body language without even trying!

But, if you want to start working on your body language now, then first take notice of how you sit, stand, walk, and talk.

Choose one area to focus on. If you want to work on your posture, get a full length mirror and practice! Using a mirror, align your ears, shoulders, and hips. Proper alignment will place your ears loosely above your shoulders, and those above your hips. Again, these points make a straight line, but the spine itself curves in a slight 'S’.

Many people try to pull the spine into a straight line, which, really, cannot be done. They are then left frustrated, and give up.

Use the same tactics when sitting. Distribute your weight evenly over your hips, and align your ears and shoulders next.

More Tips

  • Don’t cross your arms or legs
  • Have eye contact, but don’t stare
  • Relax your shoulders
  • Acknowledge people when they are talking
  • Lean towards people
  • Don’t touch your face
  • Don’t fidget
  • Use your hands more confidently
  • Don’t hold your drink in front of your chest
  • Don’t stand too close
  • Keep a good attitude –Smile and remember to have fun!

Keep in mind that with all new habits, it may take a few weeks to see some changes! And like I said before, only focus on one, maybe two things at a time! After you feel comfortable with them, focus on another area.

It’s a cycle, if you feel confident you will look confident. And if you look confident, you will feel confident.

For the best tactic, work on the inside AND the outside!Build up your self esteem and work on your nonverbal communication, body language, and posture!

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